Showing posts with label manners. Show all posts
Showing posts with label manners. Show all posts

Monday, February 25, 2008

Have a nice day - just who do you think your kidding?

Now this really get my goat - people in stores saying to you "Have a nice Day". Do they know me? Do they really care what sort of day I've had or will have? Of course they don't! Do they have any idea of what I would consider a "nice day"? Maybe for me, a "nice day" is one when their store is swallowed by an enormous hole in the ground? Maybe it's reading in the paper about a natural disaster somewhere in the world and feeling good because it happed to "them" and not to me? Maybe "a nice day" for me is the upstairs neighbor buying new furniture - all with wheels?

"Have a nice day" is a meaningless phrase used by insipid store personell because someone once told them that I't a posative thing to say, that It make people feel good and, most important, maybe will get them to come back and shop again. I've got news for! Not this grumpy old man!!!!

When I go in a store, all I want to do is wander around, maybe buy something and then leave - quietly, no fuss, no meaningless ceremonies - at most a thank you from them (obviously not from me - I have a reputation to protect). I most decidedly do not need nor want their empty wishes - just leave me alone or I may bite!

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Elevators

Anybody who has lived in Israel for more than a couple of weeks will have come across this really annoying habit.

You're in an elevator, going down or up, no matter. The car stops at your floor , the doors open and instead of getting out you are pushed to the rear of the elevator by the wave of people getting in, not one of whom seem to think that you have the right to get out and that they have the God given right to get in as fast as possible before the doors close and they loose their place. Even if they don't rush in, they just stand there, not moving aside, daring you to try and push your way through a barrier of human flesh in an effort to escape a fate worse that death - being trapped for the rest of your life in the cramped confines of a contantly moving and full elevator car full of sweaty, loud people.

It doesn't matter if there's a mother with a babys pram trying to get out. It is of no consequence if it's an elderly person aided by a walking stick. The most important thing is to get in and show the world that I AM THE BOSS!!!!! The worst case scenario is in a hospital - yes that's right, a hospital where you might expect people to be a little more considerate. Oh No, not here in the Holy Land - no matter who you are, connected to a breathing machine, on crutches, in a wheelchair, in a bed being pushed by an orderly - no one, but no one has the right to stop the average run of the mill Israeli from fullfiling his God given destiny - getting into the elevator no matter who and no matter what.

So next time you are in Israel and want to use the elevator - be warned, you may be able to get in - but you may never get out. So if you have an appointment to meet or a plane to catch - maybe its better, safer and healthier to use the stairs!